New Law Requires Poor Youth to Riot Before Soccer Matches-- Not After

By Armando Guevara, Contributing Reporter

SAO PAULO-- In preparation for the 2014 World Cup in Brazil, the country’s federal legislative body, the Congresso Nacional, has enacted a new law demanding that the poor, restless youth  riot, loot, pillage, and murder, before soccer matches, and not after, as is the norm. 

Soccer rioting has become common place in Brazil, particularly in the southern cities of Rio de Janeiro and Sao Paulo. President Lula da Silva says that the measure is meant to limit the damage, violence, and human trafficking associated with soccer riots. 

"We have to find an appropriate level of murder and rape. These are young men who do not have jobs, or hope, or morals. They do have knives and guns, however. We need to give them an appropriate outlet to express themselves. Allowing riots before matches is a sure-fire way to guarantee minimal damage to the wealthy white people of our lovely country."

While Da Silva champions the effort as a means to minimize damage, there are those across the country, that see the new law as a means to disassociate rioting with soccer. According to Ruben Dos Santos, founder of futebolriots.com, a non-profit website dedicated to promoting proper rioting, the law is attempting to change the culture of the sport. 

"I have no idea why they want to move the riots to before the matches. It can only have negative consequences. Will the angry, poverty-stricken youth have a means to destroy and vandalize? Yes. But is that what this is really about?

"This is Brazil. We're a civilized country. We don't riot in the streets for no good reason. We riot because our soccer team lost a game. Without the post-game riots, men might go home and beat their wives or children out of anger. In the Brazil I know and love, we beat other peoples' wives and children."